When you’re married to an introvert, it can be challenging at times. As an extrovert, you may find yourself feeling lonely or frustrated when your spouse would rather stay in and relax than go out and socialize.
However, there are many benefits to being married to an introvert. Introverts are often excellent listeners and are very patient, both of which can be helpful when you’re dealing with a problem.
They may also be less likely to get wrapped up in drama, and more likely to be calm and level-headed in a crisis. But, enough of me praising introverts for how wonderful they are. Let’s discuss some practical tips to help understand your introverted partner better.
Be sure to also check out this guide on how to make an Introvert-Extrovert relationship thrive.
What’s it like to be married to introvert?
How often have you heard that opposites attract? This saying is especially true when it comes to relationships. People who are introverted and people who are extroverted can make an excellent pair. The introvert can provide the extrovert with a sense of calm, while the extrovert can bring excitement and adventure into the relationship.
However, there can be some challenges when it comes to marriages between introverts and extroverts. Okay, there can be many challenges. For example, the introvert may feel like they are constantly being pulled out of their comfort zone by the extroverted spouse. Or, the extrovert may feel like the introvert is not engaging enough in the relationship.
If you’re married to an introvert, you know they need plenty of down time and may not be the life of the party. But they’re also loyal, intelligent, and sensitive spouses who will always be there for you when you need them. The partner of the introvert is fortunate to have someone who has a deep reservoir of emotional support.
Being married to an introvert can help an extrovert learn to appreciate alone time, and can also teach them how to enjoy and appreciate the simple things in life.
Married To An Introvert – 11 Tips For Extroverts
If you’re an extrovert married to an introvert, you may feel like your partner is a complete mystery to you. Honestly, that’s completely normal. Here are some tips to help you better understand and connect with your introverted spouse.
1. Understand that one person cannot fill all your needs
We are sold on the idea that our partner should complete us, but the reality is that no one can do that. Introverts and extroverts alike need to learn to develop their own interests and friendships. When you are dating an introvert, it is important to remember that they need time alone to recharge.
Don’t take it personally if your date wants some alone-time; they’re usually thinking about recharging before going out again later in the evening (or perhaps even sleeping).
2. Be considerate of your partner’s social battery
Introverts are often drained by social interaction. If you are planning a night out with friends, be sure to check in with your introverted partner and see how they’re feeling.
If they’re not up for it, don’t be offended. If your introverted spouse has been dealing with lots of social interactions, offer to stay home with them and spend some quality one-on-one time together.
When your introverted husband or wife gets home from work, a little quiet transition time will make for a much better evening for both of you. Try not to bombard them with questions or requests for help as soon as they walk in the door.
3. Develop friendships that help fill your social needs
If you are an extroverted person married to an introvert, it can feel like a constant tug of war of who’s internal battery gets charged. Often, the introverted spouse needs quiet time and space to recharge, while the extroverted spouse needs social interaction to recharge.
This can lead to a lot of tension and resentment if one spouse doesn’t understand the need of the other.
One way to combat this is to develop friendships outside of your marriage. This can help fill some of the social needs that are not being met within the marriage. Friendships will also help your introverted spouse feel more understood and supported.
4. Develop a set of close friends together
Introverts love to have a small group of close friends. They often feel overwhelmed in large groups. If your spouse is an introvert, try to develop a few close friends together. This will help them feel more comfortable and will give you a chance to socialize together in a more relaxed setting.
5. Respect your partner’s need for privacy
Introverts often need time alone to reflect and recharge. This may mean that your spouse needs some time alone each day or that they need to retreat to their bedroom for a while after dinner.
Respect your partner’s need for privacy and don’t take it personally if they want to be alone for a while. You may even want to schedule some time each day for yourself so you can recharge as well.
6. Balance your conversations
Introverts often take a longer time to process information and form responses. If you are talking to your introverted spouse, make sure that you balance out your conversations with pauses. This will give them time to think and form a response. It will also prevent them from feeling overwhelmed or talked over.
7. Let your partner know when you need them
Extroverts often need their spouse to be a sounding board for their thoughts and ideas. Let your introverted spouse know when you need them to be a listening ear. This will help them feel more connected to you and will make them feel appreciated.
Be clear about what you need, and try not to expect them to read your mind. Communication is key in any relationship, and it is especially important when you are married to an introvert.
8. Avoid trying to change your partner
Introverts are who they are. Trying to change them will only lead to frustration on both of your parts. Accept your spouse for who they are and love them for it. This will make your relationship stronger in the long run.
The introverted spouse will feel loved and appreciated, while the extroverted spouse will have someone who understands them. Even though you may not always see eye to eye, you will learn to appreciate each other’s differences.
9. Celebrate your differences
Introverts and extroverts are two very different personality types. Celebrate your differences and learn to love them. This will make your relationship more interesting and exciting. Understand that you will never be able to change each other, and learn to appreciate the things that make your spouse unique.
10. Find shared interests
Introverts and extroverts can often find common ground in their shared interests. This can help build a stronger foundation for your marriage. Find things that you both enjoy doing together and make time for them. This will help you to connect on a deeper level and will make your relationship stronger.
11. Be patient
It may take your introverted spouse a little longer to warm up to new people or situations. be patient with them and give them time to adjust. They will eventually come around, but they may need a little more time than the average person. Don’t push them too hard and respect their boundaries. Even though they may not be the life of the party, they still have a lot to offer.
Introverts can make wonderful spouses, and extroverts can learn a lot from them. If you’re married to an introvert, be sure to appreciate their unique qualities, and never take them for granted. Even though there may be some challenges, the rewards of a marriage between an introvert and extrovert are many.